I love experiences that remind me that my work WORKS!
Yesterday, I fired a contractor. (👆me joyfully waving buh bye)
All the triggers were there: Flipping the story, by-passing accountability, denying his own words, gaslighting, projecting, interrupting, attacking – followed by the typical suck-up apology text and “helpful” bs attempt to re-engage me (so he didn’t lose the job).
Sound familiar?
This was after 5 days of minimizing, not showing up, and even – (wait for it…) telling me to “calm down” when I called someone else to find the source of a leak on the roof/chimney HE installed/repaired 6 months ago. (i.e. stopped waiting for him and moved on).
Nope. Done. The end. Buh Bye.
It felt soooo good to recognize what I was dealing with and take care of mySelf RIGHT THEN, without belaboring the decision or explaining myself. He was clearly already “in his place” – he didn’t need me to put him there. 🤣
Just a clear, “No thank you, that won’t be necessary, the insurance company will be in touch if they need anything from you.” felt so much better.
🌟This is soooo different than how I would have handled this 5 years ago! 🌟
WHY?? Because I’ve Turned TOWARD my Triggers and I’ve done the work to heal them, rather than continue to outdated coping strategies – the ones that cause stress, anxiety and a shit-ton of codependent toxicity. 💩
Triggers aren’t particular – they show up wherever YOU are, be that with a contractor, a coworker, a partner, child, parent, sibling, or even a complete stranger. (you know – that person driving slow in the fast lane?😫)
If this sparks something for YOU, let me know and I’ll fill you in on the steps I took to get here! It WORKS – and it’s not hard when you learn how, and you have the right support.
I got you!
So much love, ❤️
Kate A. Bares Soul Integration Guide | Codependency Coach Helping You Reclaim Self-Worth + Emotional Freedom!
“You’re not broken. You’re coming home to yourSelf.” ~kab
